Become your own relaxation guru
As you may have noticed, relaxing deeply on your own is not easy. Doing it quickly is even harder.
There are plenty of neat relaxation techniques out there
to help you though (deep breathing, meditation, mental
imagery, autogenic training / self-hypnosis, body scan
relaxation, progressive muscle relaxation...) as well as
many good relaxation manuals that explain just what
you should do:
a) Try all these techniques, one by one
b) Figure out which ones work best for you
c) Make your own mix to get the best possible effects.
Let's face it: for most of us, in real life, it is simply
impossible... unless we follow selfRelax's interactive
learning program.
This 5-step program, made of 18 self-paced
sessions,
is designed to turn any complete beginner into a highly
skilled, self-sufficient enthusiast in 3 to 6 weeks.
Here is how it is laid out:
- I - Discover
Session 1: Welcome (3 minutes)
Introduction and presentation of the program
Session 2: Take control (3 minutes)
Learn how to control the pace of each session of the program to take the time to develop
and deepen your sensations
Session 3: How do you feel? (5 minutes)
Check your senses - you will need them to relax - and test your ability to focus on various
feelings and images
- II - Relax
This step aims at training you in the main forms of physical relaxation, focusing directly on
the body. Being able to achieve a deep state of physical relaxation is required prior using
mental relaxation techniques.
Session 4: Progressive muscle relaxation (15 minutes)
Learn how to become aware of the difference between tension and relaxation in your body,
and incidently to achieve deeper relaxation. This "active" method involves alternately tensing
then releasing various muscle groups throughout your body. It is especially useful if you feel
tense everywhere, having trouble telling the difference between what is tense and what is
relaxed, or if you simply feel uncomfortable with more "passive" methods.
This session trains you to apply PMR to your whole body: face, shoulders and neck, arms,
hands, abdomen, back and legs.
Session 5: Deep breathing (12 minutes)
Learn how to deepen and slow your breathing down in order to calm your whole body and
mind. Deep breathing involves becoming simply aware of the process of breathing for a
while, watching the air flow all the way in and out ot your lungs, more and more slowly, more
and more deeply. Little by little, you are able to breathe in a more relaxed, "baby-like" manner
from your stomach, letting it naturally rise and fall, releasing the muscles in your upper chest
and shoulders.
Session 6: Autogenic training / self-hypnosis (12 minutes)
Autogenic training, a form a self-hypnosis, involves focusing on repetitive affirmations referring
to feelings of heaviness, warmth, relaxation and calm. A good example of mind-body interaction,
this method uses the body's ability to automatically react to the thoughts that pass through the
mind, in this case simple, direct relaxation messages. As surprising as it may sound, proper
focus on imaginary feelings of heaviness, warmth, relaxation and calm can actually lead your
body to "import" these feelings, making them become real. Isn't that nice?
Session 7: Body scan relaxation (contacts) (12 minutes)
This first type of BSR involves feeling the touch of the surface upon which you are resting,
visualising all the "contact points" between your body and this surface. This technique uses
this other cool reflex of the body that makes it automatically relax the areas where it tries to
feel sensations of contact.
Session 8: Body scan relaxation (tensions) (12 minutes)
This second type of BSR involves scanning your whole body from head to toe in order to
directly release and let go of any feeling of tension, discomfort or pain.
- III - Meditate
Meditation is a mental relaxation technique that involves focusing on one particular "thing",
be it a sensation, a thought, a sound, a real or mental picture, a word, a body function, or
even the mind itself. Although some find it difficult and feel uncomfortable with it, you must
remain confident and persevere since, in meditation, "the attempt is the point", and trying
to meditate is in fact meditation. Also, a preliminary phase of deep physical relaxation is
a good way to prepare and make meditation easier, as it is the case in all meditation
sessions of this program.
Session 9: Breath counting meditation (20 minutes)
In this first meditation, you just have to count your breaths from 1 to 10, over and over again.
Yes, you can do it!
Session 10: Om meditation (20 minutes)
Just make a deep "Ooooooommmmm..." on every out-breath and see how it feels. People
have been doing this for centuries, so don't worry, it feels good!
Session 11: Mantra meditation (20 minutes)
Got a particular word or phrase that you like and makes you feel good? Lucky you: all you
have to do in this meditation is repeat it, loud or mentally, on every out-breath. Need ideas?
Here are a few: "calm", "cool", "peace", "love", "God", "one", "high", "wave", "silence"...
Session 12: Mindfulness meditation (20 minutes)
To many, it is the finest meditation experience. You are invited to step back from your own
mind and view it as if it is an ordinary muscle of your body, watching it think, noticing and
acknowledging whatever pops up and passes through it (thoughts, feelings, images...).
A slow, deep and regular breathing will be your best companion all along this unique path
to serenity and mental clarity.
- IV - Visualize
Based once again on the mind-body connection, mental or "guided" imagery is a surprisingly
powerful technique that involves picturing pleasant, relaxing and even sometimes healing
images in your mind in order to produce the corresponding sensations and effects in your
body. All senses must be involved (seeing, hearing, smelling, touching, tasting...) in order
to make these images as vivid and real as possible to best "mesmerize" the mind. And as
for meditation, all mental imagery sessions of this program begin with a preliminary physical
relaxation phase.
Session 13: A secluded beach (20 minutes)
You are bathing in the sun on this beautiful, sandy beach, hearing the soft rolling of the
waves. Watch out for sunburn!
Session 14: Solar plexus (20 minutes)
The solar plexus is this imaginary point in our stomach, slightly above the navel, considered
the "energy core" of our body where all stress and tensions gather and concentrate. Focusing
the relaxation on this point, using the image of a warm, shiny sun along with deep breathing,
is both very pleasant and beneficial since it frees our body, then our mind, of their heaviest
load of stress and discomfort. A relaxed "core" has a great influence on how the rest of the
body works.
Session 15: Oxygen (20 minutes)
Visualize pure oxygen circulating throughout your body, cleansing and rejuvenating each
one of your vessels, organs and cells.
Session 16: A special place (20 minutes)
Where would you ideally like to go to relax and rest? Where do you think you would feel
wonderfully good, unwind completely and forget all your tensions and worries? Would it
be in a real or imaginary place? Indoors or outdoors? Scenic or cosy?... Wherever it is,
however it looks, it is your own special, secret place. Just let your mind take you there
and enjoy relaxation without limits.
- V - Master
Once you have learned each one of the techniques above, the ultimate "master" skill
you should develop is to combine them all so as to achieve the greatest possible effect
in the shortest possible time.
Session 17: Maxi-relaxation (50 minutes)
This extensive combination of all techniques is intended to develop both your "endurance"
to relax and your ability to step from one technique to another.
Session 18: Mini-relaxation (50 seconds)
This extremely short final session is intended to develop your self-relaxation "impact",
i.e. your ability to relax at will very deeply and almost immediately.
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Tips and recommandations:
- Do not hesitate to repeat any session as many times as
necessary until you feel fully
comfortable with it.
- Except for the first 3 "discovery" sessions, do
not exceed one session per day in order
to give your skills the time to develop.
- Because nobody else but you knows how quickly or slowly you will
experience relaxation
feelings, every session of the program uses the "pace control" feature that makes the
session pause at certain key moments to allow you to take the time to experience or
deepen your feelings and mental images. You just have to press the "control button"
- left mouse button if using a computer - to resume the session when you want to.
(see the FAQ for more details on this very useful feature)
Once you have completed this program, you may actually not need selfRelax
anymore since
you will be able to relax all by yourself. But if you prefer being
guided, you can still play with
the "Relax now" feature and adjust your
"Personal relaxation profile" that determines
which
techniques work best for you with regards to various goals or concerns
(sleep, stress, migraine,
other pain, hypertension, pregnancy/labor, muscles tensions...). You
can also play with the
"expert mode" that allows you to design
your sessions "piece by piece" like a virtual therapist.